Privilege and Personal Networks

I was recently given the most elegant, beautifully written book, by one of my favorite Charlotte 49er donor couples - "The Boy, The Mole, The Fox and the Horse." It is a lovely story of friendship, beauty, staying present and appreciating life's simplicity. This is my favorite page.

Privilege

I was chatting with a friend last night about all of the upcoming doctor’s appointments I have/get to manage and the associated privilege of that fact. If I had this same brain tumor but did not have a great job with great insurance, who knows what kind of care I would be receiving and what it would cost. I surely wouldn’t have occupational therapists, physical therapists, a top-rated neurosurgeon, neurologist and multiple oncologists – hell, I have a neuropsychologist. I believe this oral chemo would cost around $1,000 per week – who knows about targeted radiation which involves highly technical equipment and educated people to operate.

https://khn.org/news/oral-chemotherapy/

Additionally, the privilege of pursuing holistic/eastern medicine options, in addition to traditional western medicine/science, which is sadly not promoted or covered by American medicine practices. Things like: largely vegan, organic diet, CBD/hemp oil, turkey tail mushroom extract (Thanks, Jessie!). We feel like it’s all worth a shot, but again – you have to have the ability to pay out of pocket for such luxuries.

Insert some of Brad’s financial wellness advice to college students – the importance of having and understanding your health insurance – including what your out-of-pocket expenses entail. A healthy emergency savings in this situation is the difference between being an unpleasant medical worry and a life-altering, financial-ruining one. It certainly may readjust some of our mid-range savings goals. But again, I can get the care that I need and not worry about our ability to cover other expenses. Who says financial literacy isn’t cool?

Personal Network

I keep thinking about the immense power of thoughtfully, intentionally building your personal network. (read: this is not business card-collecting and friend-making). I’m talking about connecting with, and investing in the people that you are lucky enough to cross paths with on this journey, finding out what you can learn from each other, how you can help each other, and checking in periodically to show that you care. I hope that the students and/or young professionals that I have worked with and happen to read this are nodding their heads, as they read this – if so, I’ve done something right.

The gift in all of this brain tumor situation are the reconnections I have made with all of these wonderful people in my network, from my hometown/high school, college (administration, sorority, musical theatre, and pageants), former colleagues (Las Vegas, Michigan State, Penn State), and CrossFit friends from MI, OH, PA and NC. Brad and I cannot believe the love and support that we feel from our community here in Charlotte – neighbors, gym friends, my foundation colleagues, Brad’s Dean of students’ colleagues, my 49ers athletics family – colleagues, coaches, donors and friends. It feels like we have been here for much longer than one year.

Human connection is so very powerful and we each have the ability to reach out and show kindness. From visits to cards, thoughtful gifts, calls, and food – we feel so incredibly loved and connected, in this strange disconnected time. That said, I believe that you get back what you put out into the world. And if that is correct, I feel very good about the people with whom I have aligned myself with in these first 38 years.

Gratitude

A longer growing season in NC, as we are now planting kale, sugar snap peas, acorn and butternut squash and zucchini.

Brad – he finds 20-minute segments to code his dissertation research between folding laundry, cooking us delicious meals, and tending to the aforementioned garden, and getting emotional about my trying to type these posts with more than just my right hand. I am lucky, indeed.